Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Stealth, Cunning, And Vicious Dogs. This Is WAR!

I had already let my hair grow longer than it's been in nearly forty years, and I dug out my old Elect John Patteson for North Miami City Council T-shirt from twenty years ago. A perfect disguise! Nobody would recognize me! Monkette was safely back at the house attempting to eat her way through an entire stalk of bananas. That would keep her occupied for a hours.

I headed over to Starbucks to meet up with Gloria, an Italian women noted for her skills at training killer attack dogs. Because of the large Hispanic population in South Florida she favors these Mexican ex-patriots formerly in the employ of the gangs of narco-trafficers along the Texas Mexican border. They take commands in both Spanish and English in addition to French, German, and Italian. Gloria assured us that this was a very effective way of carrying out the stealth mission of distributing Bonnie literature in hostile neighborhoods. They've also been trained to recognize Michael's T-shirts and bark at anyone so attired, running tight little circles around and between their legs as they near the polling places.

None of the dogs have green cards of course, but they're willing to work hard in exchange for life-time veternary benefits,unlimited doggy treats for life, the right to piss on the legs of anybody they don't like and the right to shit wherever they fancy. They want to be just like the current council.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

The current council members voted to have HEALTH insurance FOR LIFE for themselves and their FAMILIES. North Miami taxpayers and renters will have to pay for this FOR LIFE. WAS THIS LEGAL?????? Could this bankrupt the CITY OF NORTH MIAMI????? I won't mind HEALTH INSURANCE FOR LIFE. Every two years, there is the possibility of a new mayor and two new council members, which would mean taxpayers would have to pay health insurance for them also. Next time, I want to run for city council in NORTH MIAMI. A Very Concerned Accountant.

4:02 PM  

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